I need to vent....

[Method]

Spyder Wrote:Hahaha

Shitting at work is one of my favorite past times. There is nothing more fulfilling than getting paid to take a shit. There are a few one horse stalls at work that I seek out when I "do business" as you put it...lol...but if I'm in a jam, I'm not opposed to shitting next to someone. The only caveat to that is the courtesy flush. It is no longer an optional practice, but a necessity. I will shout a reminder to the man next to me if he doesn't live by that code.

As far as time frame, I've noticed that my shitting times have increased since I got my smartphone. At it's peak, my time spent in the stall was about 5% shitting, 95% Angry Birds...lol...I've dialed that back a lot now.

My biggest pet peeve in public shitting is the sand paper-like toilet tissue. That stuff is worthless. I'd like to think that my asshole is as durable as the next guy's, but it has very little tolerance to that thin torture device. I won't even get started with the dispensers, but there is an overdue need to revamp them.

To that end, I love "droppin the kids off at the pool" when a coworker is in the bathroom brushing and flossing his teeth. See, I personally think that shouldn't be done in the one-stall bathroom, and so I take pleasure in tainting their teeth the infused smell/taste of human excrement. It's like they are gargling w poop